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Aunt25
October 16, 2007

LIFE LESSONS

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FOR THE OCTOBER RR SCRAPLIFT CHALLENGE, WHICH WAS TO DO A LO THAT WAS REFLECTIVE IN NATURE - THIS IS A SCRAPLIFT OF KELLIKROPPER'S FALL DELIGHT - http://www.scrapbook.com/myplace/index.php?mod=galleries&u=32331&m=view&id=1079325&page=1&a=9275. SORRY ABOUT THE SHADOW ON THE JOURNALING - IT'S NOT THERE IRL - IT'S JUST ME WITH THE CAMERA - THE PHOTO ON THE LEFT IS ME AT 18 (DON'T LAUGH AT THE BIG HAIR, IT WAS THE EARLY 90'S!) AND THE ONE ON THE RIGHT WAS TAKEN A FEW MONTHS AGO.

JOURNALING READS -

Call it inexperience. Call it young and stupid. I was 18 and fresh out of high school. My first taste of real freedom. The majority of my spare time was spent partying hard with friends. That was how we met. The person, who at the time, I thought was the love of my life. He was 34 and more mature than any guy I had gone out with in the past. We talked for a while, went out a few times, and very quickly a serious relationship formed. While the relationship was growing, I moved into my own place and invited him to move in with me. Shortly thereafter is when his true colors began to show. Small sign of possessiveness – having to know where I was, who I was with, and what I was doing at all times. I overlook this because I love him. Then his drug and alcohol problem became obvious. Within an hour of coming home from work, he would be drunk, high, or both. I overlook this because I love him. The fighting became more frequent, and physical. I overlook this because I love him. After every fight, it was always the same thing – I love you baby. It will never happen again. I believed him because I love him. He was smart – the hits, and resulting bruises, were always in places that could easily be hidden under clothes. This continued for three years. Why? Because I love him. Until one day. It was late and close to bedtime. I don’t remember what that particular fight was about, only that it ended the same as all the rest. Almost. After things settled down and he was asleep, I laid awake all night thinking. What am I doing? Why am I living like this? I realized for the first time that I did not love him. And I made a decision. He left for work early the next morning, and as soon as I was sure he was on the road, I got up. Room by room I went, taking all of his stuff and putting it in trash bags. By the time he came home from work that evening, all of his belongings were sitting by the front door. That day a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. The next few weeks were full of phone calls all with the same message – I’ve learned my lesson. I love you baby. For the first time in three years, I listen to the voice of reason in my head – I will not go back to that type of relationship, ever.

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing you cannot do. Eleanor Roosevelt


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