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This layout is really all about the journaling. It was an observation that I had about Charlotte in 2005 as I watched Charlotte at a birthday party.

The journaling States:
I watched you yesterday while at Devon’s birthday party. He had a piñata. When it broke, every child dropped to the floor and scrambled for all the goodies-- every child, that is, but you. I watched you pace on the outskirts of the group, searching for a way in. You never found it. Every time more candy fell, you had wandered to another spot, trying to find some scraps that the others had missed. I wanted so badly to jump in and help but I just sat and watched, feeling sad. When nothing else could be found, you brought me your bag full of treasures to hold, not complaining about how little was in there.
On the way home, you talked about this experience and I thought my heart would break. “Mommy, I didn’t get much candy today. There wasn’t any room for me. I was too small. All the kids think I’m a baby.” I reassured you that no one thought you were a baby. I left it at that but the whole experience left a lump in my throat. I lay awake in bed last night feeling sad that the big, bad world was starting to wear away your innocence. I can no longer shelter you from the unfairness of life. Some people get a lot of things from a piñata, while others don’t. The difference is that you have to try your best to succeed. Even if all you get is a little bit of candy, if you tried your hardest, that is all that is important. If you don’t succeed, I will be there for you always, to listen and to be the safe place in this big bad world of ours.


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