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I have been so down the past month. This firday would have been my brother Tony's 41st b-day. A month exatcly will be the day he passed 3 years ago. I have been thinking about him so much. It dosent get better it gets WORSE. My sister called the other day cryin asking me WHEN?? I said NEVER. I know I am being so negative but it hurts SoO deeply.
My brother taught me so many little things in life that make me think about life so much diffrent. One day he was sitting in a chair outside with his eyes closed smiling. I was like what the heck are you doing you look like a weirdo. He laughs and tells me "try it baby sis". So I did he said but be serious about it. I closed my eyes and after only a few seconds I could not help but smile. THe sun felt so good on my face it was almost heavely. It took me far from this world it felt like forever. Those little things we always take for granted everyday he was treasuring them cause he knew he was going to die. I could tell you a million stories like that of him. I miss him. SO can you tell me WHEN?


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