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I hope nobody thinks I am a horrible mom for my journaling, because I truly love my baby girl! ~ but I really went through a difficult time when she was born, and I wanted to make sure to document it, especially so she would know it's okay if she goes through the same thing when she has a new baby. Journaling: I was looking at some of your baby pictures the other day and couldn’t help notice that the majority of them are of you sleeping. What’s ironic is that you rarely slept. The piercing cry you see in this photo is actually a much more accurate picture of what a typical day was like with you in those first few months. You are almost seven months old today and I can finally look back at these photos and laugh. But at the time, it really wasn’t so funny. The first three months of your life were probably the most difficult three months of my entire life. And I just want you to know that sometimes having a baby is not all about sweet dreams and lullabies. Babies cry. A lot. Sometimes they don’t sleep. You would think that I would have been a little more prepared being that you were our second and all. But I guess I just always skipped over the articles about colic and dealing with postpartum. It was something that I just never expected to happen to me, I suppose. There literally were days that you would cry from morning to night and from night again until morning. We tried everything…car rides, white noise, walks, swaddling. Nothing worked. I just don’t want you to go into motherhood thinking it is going to be a fairy tale. It’s not. So please promise me that you will accept my help when you become a mother. And I promise that you will not be burdening me. I could kick myself now for not asking for the help I desperately needed. So do not ever feel guilty asking anyone for a hand. I recently read an article in American Baby magazine that summed up those early days perfectly. “It sucks. And then it gets better. And then it gets even better.” Isn’t that the truth! I love you, Lillian.


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