I'm always the one taking the pictures so here is my "sudo-self portrait"
Classy women never show their toes in public.
Real mothers go barefoot as often as they can.
Classy women are always dressed up.
Real mothers don't comb their hair before lunch on Saturday and shed their work clothes the moment they come through the door.
Classy women never yell.
Real mothers scream their heads off when their children are bleeding, playing in a football game, or about to do something they aren't supposed to do.
Classy women read newspapers and ten-pound tomes on the New York Times best-seller list.
Real mothers read the comics first thing in the morning and picture books at bedtime. During lunch, mothers read dog-eared books about how to discipline their children properly.
Classy women do not eat leftovers from their children's plates or lick the spoon after mixing chocolate icing.
Real mothers do, and consequently gain two pounds per child per year for the rest of their lives.
Classy women cook exotic entrees like lamb and goose.
Real mothers order truckloads of pizza and know that thin hamburgers are better than thick ones. In a pinch, though, they can whip up a bowl of spaghetti.
Classy women never lose their dignity.
Real mothers hang dignity in a closet and pull it out only for family photos and parent-teacher conferences.
Poem submitted to the scrapbook.com library by: Jessica G-B